Wowey Zowey! 10 Quotes!

Hey just a reminder to check the post before this regarding Rainn Wilson's privates...

Now on to quotes!

"Can I have everyone's attention, please? I just wanted to say that the women in this office are terrible. Especially the ones who wrote that stuff in the bathroom about Michael. Having a bathroom is a privelege. It's a ladies' room. And if you can't act like ladies, then maybe you won't have a bathroom."
-Dwight

"I didn't go to formal business school, that is true. But in a way, I went to the best business school of all: Tony Robbins's Three-Day Personal Power seminar. Did you know, Tony Robbins's watch costs more than I make in a year?"
-Michael

"The people I respect- heroes of mine would be Bob Hope, um Abraham Lincoln, definitely, Bono, and probably God would be the fourth one. And I just think all thouse people really helped the world in so many ways that it's really beyond words. It's really incalculable."
-Michael

"If I changed the life of one person...just one person...well, okay, one is aiming pretty low. Let's say I change the lives of five thousand people...ten thousand...okay, five thousand, I'd be satisfied for starts...."
-Michael

"Pizza. The great equalizer. Everybody likes pizza. Poor people like pizza, rich people like pizza. White people like pizza, black people like pizza....Do black people like pizza?"
-Michael

"Toby is in H.R., which means he technically works for corporate. So he's not really a part of our family. Also, he's divorced, so he's not really part of his family."
-Michael

"There are several ways you can tell if a perp is lying. The liar will avoid eye contact. The liar will cover part of the face with his or her hand, especially the mouth. The liar will perspire. Unfortunately, I spoke to Oscar over the phone, so none of that is useful."
-Dwight

"My proudest moment here...was a young Guatemalan guy, first job in the country, barely spoke English. Came to me and said, 'Mr. Scott, would you be the godfather of my child?' Wow, wow, wow....Didn't work out in the end. We had to let him go, he sucked."
-Michael

"I've been Michael's number two guy for about five years. We make a great team. Michael is like Mozart. And I'm like Mozart's friend. No, I'm like Butch Cassidy and Michael's like Mozart. You try to hurt Mozart and you're going to get a bullet in your head. Courtesy of Butch Cassidy."
-Dwight

"Should I have reported Oscar's malfeasance? Probably. But now I know something he doesn't want me to know...and I can use his malfeasance to establish leverage. Otherwise, it's just malfeasance for malfeasance's sake."
-Dwight

So anyway, I guess it's time for me to go scour the internet for Office-related videos again.

KKras